Does This Look Familiar?

Are the 2008 Brewers the 2007 Phillies?

2008 Phillies, meet your 2007 dopplegangers. A team that goes on a run down the stretch to make the playoffs for the first time in a long time? Check. Dominant starting pitcher in the regular season who loses his playoff start? Check. General "Just Happy to Be Here" Attitude? Check. High-scoring, HR-based offense that disappeared in the postseason? Check.

Phils Win 5-2.

In the playoffs, you need someone to step up besides your all stars. Enter Shane Victorino and Jason Werth. We know them well, but they're far from household names. First four times these two got to the plate resulted in 3 doubles and a Grand Slam. That's a good day.

Charlie Manuel also got props from the announcers for switching Victorino and Werth in the lineup. Werth went on to get two doubles in the game. Of course, Utley and Howard are a combined 1-8 in the series, which is keeping me up at night. Unfortunately, that's not a joke.

The Good: Victorino, Myers, Werth, Feliz. It was a righties day at the ballpark. Lidge needed only 12 pitches to record his second save of the postseason. Maybe Mitch Williams was right, and Lidge was too well rested for his pitches to be effective. Maybe Milwaukee has already given up on this series. Maybe this was the one-game quiet before the Lidge-implosion storm. I'll take it.

The Bad: Myers first inning, in which he had the bases loaded with one out and got a miracle double play ball. Wow. That could have been a lot worse. Kudos to Myers for shaking it off and pitching a good game. Myers also walked in a run, which is generally frowned upon in baseball circles.

The Hero: Shane Victorino. A Grand Slam off of the unhittable CC Sabathia in the playoffs? If you made it up, no one would believe you. Runner up to Brett Myers. 7 strong innings, gave up only 2 runs.

The Goat: CC Sabathia. He struggled with his location (and the umpire's strike zone) all day, only lasting 3 2/3 innings and throwing 98 pitches. Of course, he single-handedly got Milwaukee here. This was his fourth consecutive start in three days rest.

The Take-Away Point: This Phillies team is for real. Now, if we can only get Utley and Howard to start hitting, and if we face the Dodgers in the NLCS...

Is the Long Nightmare Finally Over?

For those of you just emerging from your bomb shelters after the Cuban Missile Crisis, the Phillies won Game 1 of their NLDS series with the Brewers yesterday, 3-1. This game featured 8 shutout innings buy Cole Hamels, a heart attack save by Brad Lidge, a crappy offense, and miscues by the Brewers that basically gave us the three runs.

(Also, as an aside, a lot has happened since then. Kennedy got assasinated, his little brother ran for President and also got shot, their was this big bruhaha about a conspiracy. Also, the Phillies won a World Series! Crazy, right? There was this third baseman, Mike Schmidt, who was pretty much the best in the history of the game. But we're pissed again, cause that was 28 years ago. We'll catch up more later.)

The Good: The Phils offense did nothing, and they won.

The Bad: The Phils offense did nothing. Also, Brad Lidge is no longer "Lights Out" but more "Is Someone Messing With The Dimmer Switch, 'Cause I'm Trying to Read the Paper."

The Hero: Cole Hamels. 8 shutout innings, 2 hits. Good thing they didn't let him come out in the ninth.

The Goat: Mike Cameron/Rickie Weeks. Weeks misplayed a bunt by Hamels for an error, allowing Hamels to get on base and the runner to move to second. Cameron then misplayed a line drive by Chase Utley, in what should have been an error, allowing the Phillies first two runs to score. Gotta love that hometown scoring!

The Take-Away Point: Undecided. On one hand, you need things to go your way to win in the playoffs. On the other, your offense is going to have to eventually score some runs to win, also. We'll see.

Win it For...

Ok, allow me to preface this post, my first in quite some time, by saying that I'm stealing the idea for this column. Bill Simmons wrote a column prior to the Red Sox winning the World Series in 2004 in which he listed all of the people who would benefit from a Red Sox championship. Granted, the Phillies haven't gone nearly 100 years without a title, but the city of Brotherly Love has endured a losing streak in the triple digits when you combine all of our pro sports franchises. And, specifically for the contributors to this blog, that means no Philadelphia championships in our conscious fan-lives. Anyway, the point here is that while the idea for this column is not original, the thoughts are and I'm certain the Mr. Simmons would see this imitation as flattery and nothing more. And with that....

Win it for all of us Philadelphia sports fans under the age of 30 who have never truly experienced a championship (sorry Soul, Kixx & Wings supporters).

Win it for Charlie Manuel. Listen, I was and remain one of the biggest critics of Uncle Charlie's strategic management of a baseball game. But he has done the unthinkable. He has managed to turn the country-bumpkin attitude into an endearing quality, managed to guide this team to the playoffs in back to back seasons and managed to win over the fans of this town against all odds.

Win it for Donovan McNabb, Allen Iverson, Eric Lindros, et al. A Philadelphia championship of any kind will diminish the amount of abuse that Philadelphians lump on all of our superstars because we are so desperate for a parade.

Win it for Doug Parker. A Phillies title would go a long ways to ending the incessant E-A-G-L-E-S chants heard during mid-summer Phills games. The more he laments these incidents, the more I agree with my angry, hippy friend.

Win it for Terry Francona. And beat the Red Sox to do it. F-you, Terry. We haven't forgotten how you basically gave up on this town, how you continued to show loyalty to guys like Kevin Sefcik who must've had pictures or performed unspeakable acts on you and how you called your time here a mulligan. Listen ass, maybe your heart wasn't in it here, but ours was.

Win it for the Phillie Phanatic. Can you imagine the belly thrust he's gonna do if they won this thing?

Win it for Pat Burrell. Pat has certainly had his ups and downs with this team, but this is undoubtedly his last year in Philadelphia. In hindsight, this was a guy who never got in trouble off the field, never turned on the fans, even when they turned on him and who loves it here.

Win it for the Phillies fans in North Jersey and New York or just those who associate with others from those areas and who constantly have to listen to how the Mets (and Marlins) have one more World Series title then the Phillies, despite far fewer years of existence.

Win it for my Dad. He's always loved baseball and he's the reason I love baseball. I'd love nothing more then to celebrate with him, even without the guarantee that he would buy the beer.

Win it for Broad Street. It's been a long time since something positive rolled down that street.

Win it for the flag pole. That 1980 banner looks awfully lonely in centerfield.

Win it for ESPN. We need something to change the national media perception of Philadelphia fans as the slime of the earth. I think a title would do that.

Win it for all those sissy athletes who have thought it was too difficult to play in front of our passionate fan base, some of those who even went so far as to say the fans are one of the reasons for the championship drought. No one says that in Cleveland or Chicago and they've gone a lot longer then us without a World Series victory.

Win it for Ed Wade. Wade was always scared to make that big move and that, along with no-trade clauses, will be his legacy here. But don't forget, the Ed Wade regime brought us Hamels, Utley, Rollins, Howard, Myers, Burrell and Victorino. Pat Gillick has brought us Jamie Moyer and Brad Lidge. And Wes Helms, Geoff Jenkins, So Taguchi, Joe Blanton, Adam Eaton, etc. I'm not trying to deify Wade, but let's remember that he did do some things well. If you recall, the year that the Mets traded Scott Kazmir to the Devil Rays for Victor Zambrano, Wade declined to move Ryan Howard for Kris Benson.

Win it for William Penn. A Phillies hat looks really good on that statue.

And finally, win it for me. I need this. I need to know it can happen. This window is going to close before you know it. And if it does...if it does...I'll still be there.

Preliminary Verdict- Field Position

The Bears scored three touchdowns tonight. The lenght of these drives-59, 60, and 24 yards. The offense did not have the consistency necessary to move the ball enough to win the field position battle. Blame the run game, blame the recievers, blame whomever.

The papers will talk about the goaline stand, but field position carried the day. That and DeSean Jackson's terrible dropped punt.

Dear 610 WIP: You're Retarded.

Heard this morning on 610, spoken by Angelo Cataldi (paraphrase) "I don't know about Cole Hamels. He seems like a California boy, a little soft. I don't know if I want him pitching Sunday, if it comes down to that."

Now, we all know Angelo is a moron. I've come to believe (hope) that the Angelo we hear on the radio is a character he plays up as a reactionary, overemotional Philly fan. Otherwise, he's a big tranny with frontal lobe problems. And by that I mean his brain.

Let's leave out for a second the fact that there is no one else on the team you'd rather have pitcher in this situation. Save that Brett Myers stuff for someone else. He's a wackjob, and he's gotten shelled his last two starts.

Cole Hamels is the best pitcher on your team. He's one of the best pitchers in the NL. I'm no stats geek, but the way this is often determined is by using a stat called ERA+. This stat shows how good a pitcher's ERA is above average in that league, and makes adjustments for parks, etc. Average ERA+ is 100. Higher than 100 is good, lower is bad. (all stats courtesy of baseball-reference.com).

Cole Hamels' ERA+ is 145, good for fifth in the NL. His ERA is 3.09, good for sixth in the league. He leads the league in innings pitched and starts made. He goes seven innings every time he takes the ball. He's fourth in the league in strikeout to walk ratio. HE LEADS THE LEAGUE IN WHIP.

WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU PEOPLE?

Easy LoveTron. Settle down. The point, simply put, is this; Elite athletes oftentimes leave Philly because of unfair criticism. Cole Hamels is one of BEST PITCHERS IN THE MOTHEREFFING GAME OF BASEBALL AND OUR SPORTS RADIO HOST DOESN'T WANT HIM PITCHING A GAME TO GET INTO THE PLAYOFFS BECAUSE HE'S FROM CALIFORNIA.

Breathe. Breathe. Breathe.

Who Wants Jim Leyland Now?

Much ado has been made in the past that the Phillies picked the affable, pot bellied, national league challenged Charlie Manuel as their skipper back in 2005. Many people did not like this choice, instead wanting Jim Leyland, the chain smoking national league genius. Leyland, of course, quickly paid dividends for The Tigers in 2006, taking them to the World Series. As we all know, the Tigers lost to the St. Louis Cardinals in five games, allowing the Cardinals to become the worst team to ever win a World Series (83 wins). No time to go over fielding bunts in Spring Training, apparently.

Since that time, the Tigers have not played to their potential. Despite the addition of several big ticket free agents, the Tigers have been haunted by the onset of age in their older roster, a bullpen that has never performed the same as 2006, and the haunting feeling that 2006 might have just been lightning in a bottle, and the Tigers simply aren't as good as we (and they) thought they were. And maybe Zumaya's obsession with Guitar Hero.

Conversely, since 2006, the Phillies appeared in their first postseason in 14 years (and were quickly swept out). They are in place to make the playoffs again this year. Uncle Chuck has adeptly managed this team through various injuries, starting pitching woes, and a lineup that is consistently hitting worse than they did last year, from Howard and Utley to Rollins and Ruiz.

Since 2005, Charlie Manuel has gone 351-294 as the Phillies' manager, for a 54.4 winning %. In one less season, Jim Leyland has gone 255-227, for a 52.9 winning %. More wins, more playoff appearances (hopefully), same number of championships. So Why did we want Leyland again?

------------------------------------------------------------------
Gavin Floyd Update: Basically, he'd still be your #2 starter at this point.

Pitcher Record(Starts) ERA (ERA+)
Gavin Floyd 16-8(31) 3.84(119)
*********************************************
Phillies Starting Pitchers
Cole Hamels 14-10(33) 3.09(145)
Joe Blanton 8-12(32) 4.79(87)*
Jamie Moyer 15-7(32) 3.78(118)
Kyle Kendrick 11-9 (30) 5.46(82)**
Adam Eaton 4-8(21) 5.80(77)***
Brett Myers 10-13(30) 4.55(98)

* Stats using both AL and NL numbers for this year.
**I know he doesn't start anymore.
***I know he doesn't start anymore either. Does not include minor league numbers.

Lost Opportunities

I know what you're thinking about right now. You're thinking about a particularly leggy blonde you met at the bar recently. She's just the right height, just the right look, and just the right amount of bitchiness. She swears, drinks hard alcohol, is dressed a little to trashy for the current establishment, and smokes a couple of cigarettes a day. You're thinking, all systems go.

Then something happens. Maybe you spill your drink on yourself. Maybe your hairpiece falls off. Maybe her fat friend shows up. But, most likely, you do something to F it all up.

Ladies and gentlemen, your 2008 Philadelphia Phillies.

Much like the above discussed bar tramp (I've decided she's a divorcee in her early thirties), the NL East is there for the taking. But not for your Phils. In case you haven't heard, the Phils got blown out by the Braves on a night when the Mets choked away a four-run lead. A win there would have pushed their lead in the NL East to 2.5 with 3 to play (four for the Mets).

"Hello? Phillies? This is opportunity. Yeah, I've been standing here a while. Oh. Busy? Ok, I'll come back later, maybe."

Sooner or later this team - which has been on a tear - has got to reach out and grab destiny by the short and curlies. Until then, they're going to be a poor man's version of the Mid-90s Cleveland Indians-a great show, but no championships.

Who feels great about a rotation of Hamels, Myers, and Moyer in the postseason now?

Stick a Fork in Him

Let me just get this out of the way up front. I love Brian Dawkins. I love him a wierd, brotherly kind of way. If he showed up at my house around dinner time, I would just set him a place at the table and not ask him football-related questions. We would discuss awesome things, like how he likes Wolverine, and why he kept wearing shirt sleeves on his head with "B-Dawk" and "Weapon-X" written on them with a sharpie. I think we would be friends.

The man is done. It's time for him to hang them up.

I don't put the blame on him for the T.O. goaline catch against the Cowboys. T.O. scores off that pattern if he's single covered by anybody. But I've noticed some things in the last two years.

I trace them back to the 2006 season, also known as the "Finally We have an Undersized, Undertalented, White Quarterback Who's Fiery," season with Jeff Garcia. Dawk had a foot injury nearly that entire year, walking around in a boot during the week and playing on Sunday. He also played completely out of his mind, both in coverage and run support. He made plays on the ball, delivered hits, and always came through for a team that, quite frankly, wasn't very good.

But that greatness came at a cost. Much like Celtics great Kevin McHale, playing with that quasi-undisclosed foot injury had long-term repercussions. He showed signs of losing a step in 2007, small things. We all remember that great hog-tie tackle of a Giants RB near the goaline last year...but the reason that play was necessary was Dawk got beat to the edge. He was in position, He read the play, he just couldn't get there.

Last week, the Cowboys passing game exposed both Dawkins and Consedine. This week against the Steelers, Dawk made some great plays...blitzing. Dawk was around the line of scrimmage on passing downs. D-Coordinator Jim Johnson is covering up for him, keeping his weaknesses from being exposed.

Dawkins makes great plays on the ball, and is the best blitzer from the secondary I have ever seen. But, like all great things, his time appears to be coming to an end. After the season, I think he and the Eagles should have a talk. He's been the heart of this franchise since the Ray Rhodes era, but the time has come to close this chapter in his life.

Okay, Deep Breaths, Please

Your Phightins are 1.5 up with 4 to play. (The Mets have 5 left). The Birds are 2-1, which ties them for last in the division-or third, if you're a glass-half- full kind of person.

Phils: Looking good. From where I sit, they need to win two of these last four to win the division, preferably three. The Nationals, for whatever reason, play the Phils tough, and they're in town for the last three games of the season. In other words, let's win tonight, huh Brett?

Eagles: I don't know about this team. I have serious reservations about the pass defense and pass rushing. Here's a quick breakdown of the last two games.

Dallas-good offensive line. No sacks. Pass Defense shredded. Loss.

Pittsburgh-terrible offensive line. 9 sacks, 4 more tackles of the QB for short gain. Defense only gives up 6 points. Win.

Not hard to figure out. When we play a team with a good O-line, we lose. When we play a team with a bad O-line, we win. That makes this team mediocre. Injuries to McNabb and Westbrook are troubling, as is LJ Smith's consistent lack of ballsiness.

Eagles stock: Down.

Phillies stock: Up.

Crazed Senior Accused of Robbery at Linc

To all the naysayers and those who would have Brian Dawkins written of because of his age, suck a fat one. Without even looking at every FS in the league I can confidently say that B Dawk is top 3. Ed Reed is the only one I can think of on his level. # 20 never should have been T.O. last Monday and his amazing play on "Ben" yesterday proved that "Weapon X" is indeed alive and well. When all in said and done, Dawkins should go down as a top 10 talent in Philly sports history. In the mean time, I will be sure to enjoy every moment of his play, even if he's eligible for Social Security in 3 years. During yesterday's game clinching play ( it was, face it), I shouted " Is he old now?" at the TV while doing several of B Dawk's famed moves. Am I a little off? Yes, but that's a topic for a different time. I am just chalking it up to extreme excitement because the "old man" showed a young kid what it's like to play in the NFL in Philly, home of the best fans in the NFL.

Birds/ Dallas Diary

8:20 PM: Ten minutes until game time. I am already tired of all of the Romo/Jessica Simpson talk. She's a cover up, what a queer.

8:23 PM: The Eagles Pre-game crew is ripping on Jessica Simpson. It's like shooting fish in a barrel.

8:26 PM: What's the over/under for Romo/Simpson and T.O/McNabb references tonight? I am going with 7.5. I am taking the over, the Rook has the under.

8:29 PM: Keyshawn, Chris Berman, you get my approval for picking the Birds to win. Cris Carter, Stu Scott and Tom Jackson, you go to hell. You go to hell and you die.

8:30 PM: The Rook gets things rolling by cracking on Kornheiser's comb over. He needs to cut that thing before he gets mistaken for Donald Trump.

8:32 PM: The fact that Ron Jaworski is prominently involved with tonight's broadcast makes me feel all warm inside. It's either that or the Sam Adams Octoberfest. Westbrook is getting prepared to Marshall Faulk. Hopefully this refers to his on-field expliots and not his guest spots on Arli$$.

8:34 PM: First commercial break just came and I have already called T.O. many horrible things that would upset my Grandmother if she weren't a die-hard Birds fan too.

8:37 PM: A 2 minute lovefest for Jerry Jones jsut wrapped up. Remember kids, if you are a redneck, sleep with your sister and sign a bunch of convicted felons, you too can be considered a good NFL owner.

8:39 PM: Hank Williams kicks it off with a Mexican-themed MNF song. It just never gets old, not matter how bad it may be.

8:41 PM: You fear Demps. You kick out of bounds. Tra Thomas jsut did some crazy dance. I am so hyped.

8:43 PM: I have a man crush on Brian Westbrook. First down Birds. 14 yard gain on 2nd and 10.


8:44 PM: Completion to Celek. FIRST DOWN!!!! Great job by JJ on the block.

8:45 PM: Compared to Super 5's eloquent delivery, Marcus Spears sound like Rain Man. He makes sure to not not to call Pac Man by his nickname.

8:47 PM: DeSean never had control. Call it growing pains young man. It's ok. 3 points, 7 would be better, but I'll take it.

8:49 PM: I am so confused. A commercial with a little kid speaking Spanish while wearing Giants gear just aired.I can't make fun of a kid so I will just scold his parents for allowing him to wear that.

8:50 PM: Decent Felix Jones return negated by a holding call. The lesson as always is that the Cowboys can keep their hands off of men.

8:52 PM: My buddy just texted and referred to DeSean as " D Jax". I like it.

8:54 pM: Sheldon just did a crazy ninja tackle on T.O. Bad news is, Owens caught it.

8:55 PM: Nice limp wristed flick by Romo. What a Mary Jane.

8:56 PM: 72 yard TD to T.O.. Considine must die.

9:00 PM: I don't think I have ever gone from loving a football player to hating him as badly as I hate T.O. He is a no good c********r. Fill in the blanks.

9:03 PM: G-LEW!!! G-LEW!!! He looks just like the rapper Redman. Seriously, Google image it.

9:06 PM: Brian Westbrook is so good. Barry Sanders and Brian Westbrook. The two best backs I have seen.

9:07 Pm: They call him Pac Man, everyone knows his name. Buck drops it.

9:08 PM: D Mac skips it to B West. Damn right your bad 5. Akers makes it 7-6. I don't like the clean shaven look for David. I hope he doesn't read this, I don't need a judo chop.

9:12 PM: I didn't like this Felix Jones kid before this.

9:14 PM: 5 needs to man up right now.

9:16 Pm: Nice no-call on the facemask ref.

9:19 PM: I still don't like the Samuel signing. Effing right anyway son.

9:21 PM Yeah, G Lew had some jersey but Newman was all up in his crease.

9:24 Pm:Freakin' Klecko. I love Westbrook. 14-13. No 2 pt?

9:28 PM: Jones ain't so good now is he?

9:30 PM: I just did a silent TD dance. WOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!! I hope Romo doesn't grip Jessica like that.

9: 49-9:52 PM: DeSean Jackson, you stupid mother. You're lucky the Cowboys didn't pick that up now. Westbrook bailed you out and you better apologize your @ss off tonight. You cocky, stupid motherf**ker.

9:55 PM: Cry about that, T.O. Holding!!!!! Ok, I have nothing else.

9:57 PM: Wonderful stand by the Birds. Make up for your dumb play #10. Or not. 9 yards.

10:02 PM: Jackson catches a nice ball. I call him more names. It's going to take a lot for me to get over this. You're not bigger than the team young man.

10:04 PM: Horrible overthrow by Nabby. Oh!! What's that?!?! Penalty!!! GO BIRDS.

10:07 PM: Vintage McNabb.

10:12 PM: Donovan needed that. He got hit and he got up fine. My man. Super 5.

10:25 Pm: I read something horrible during halftime. Nate Dogg, yes that Nate Dogg, had suffered his second stroke in 10 months. Nate is the man, best of luck in your recovery.

10:35 Pm: Get a little pressure on Romo, have the best FS in the game pop the WR. Brian Dawkins baby. My favorite Eagle ever.

10:36 PM: Mr. Power's Top 5 Favorite Eagles: 1. B Dawk 2. Freddie Barnett 3. McNabb 4. Westbrook 5. James Joseph 5A. Andy Harmon

10:40 PM: Re-kick. This just in: Great game.

10:42 PM: DeSean Jackson really angers me. Pacman just stabbed someone on his punt return. He makes it rain.

10:45 PM: Jaws is comparing Romo to Brady. Let's see, they are both gay, both wear similiar colors, both date " hot chicks". I guess we are 3 for 3.

10:47 PM: I just called Asante Samuel by the name Joselio Hanson. If I call him Duce Staley I am quitting drinking for good.

10:49 PM: Horseflop call on Cole. turns into a big Barber run.

10:53 PM: Bradley should have made Barber buy him dinner first.

11:02 PM: "Hey, let's all suck on Zach Thomas' balls becaue his arm got in the way of a pass that his back was turned to!!"

11:04 PM :Farve...blah blah...FACE MASK..Birds should have run a play

11:07 PM: This timeout brought to you by On-Cor Chicken Parm. G-LEW.

11:08 PM: WEST-BROOK.

11:13 PM: Salt and Vinegar chips, beer and Wheat Thins. Hangioer prevention has begun.

11:20 PM: Bad guys get a FG. Demps with a nice return.

11:34 PM: BS pass interference call. TD Dallas.

11:45-11:150 PM: Gonna vom......

11:54 PM:...........

Random Thoughts

I am wearing a torn short sleeve on my head trying to be like Brian Dawkins. I am sitting here trying to calm myself because my wife is pregnant and trying to sleep in the other room. My brother in law and I are compiling our top 5 hated Cowboys ( Irvin, T.O., Aikman, Deion and Roy Williams). Most of my work day was spent talking up this game. I told a Dallas fan that I work with that T.O. and Romo enjoy each other's compan ya little too much. The Birds record this year should be 13-3. A little high you say? **** YOU. I'm tired of all the McNabb and Reid haters. Where would the Birds be without them? DeSean Jackson is the shit. Give Romo WRs like Pinkston,Thrash, Reggie Brown and Jabar Gaffney and see how good he is. 24-13 Birds is the call. I may do a diary, I'm not sure yet. Lastly, is it wrong for me to hope my child's first words are " DALLAS SUCKS"? GO BIRDS.

So This Is What Having a WR is Like....

What's that? We've got a reciever who catches with his hands, and in traffic? Who actually looks like he belongs in the NFL? And we drafted this guy? Consider this the first meeting of the DeSean Jackson Fan Club.

Phillies Heart Braves: Nationals Next

Somehow, the Phillies survived a series in which Hamels gave up 9 runs (4 earned) and in which Adam Eaton pitched...twice. But now Eaton is headed for the minors, possibly for J.A. Happ, and the Phillies...are headed for sexytown.

And by that I mean Washington DC, for a three game get well series with the Nats. For the Phils to make an impression on us that they're serious about the postseason, a three game sweep is a must. The opportunity is there. First, on Tuesday we face a pitcher who's almost as bad as Myers (Balester, 5.75 ERA). Second, it's the Nationals. Come on. Their best player, Nick Johnson, is out for the year. Second best player, Dmitri Young is out with diabetes indefinitely. It just goes down from there, and not in a good way.

It's time to start beating up on lesser teams, the way only the Phils can. So long as they don't start any lefties.

Your Gavin Floyd Update

Not that I'm letting this get too far or anything. The Phils GM, in all his infinite, if crotchety, wisdom, traded Mr. Floyd away. A single season later, we trade for Joe Blanton. LET'S BREAK IT DOWN!

Pitcher Record(Starts) ERA (ERA+)
Gavin Floyd 10-6(19) 3.52(124)
*********************************************
Phillies Starting Pitchers
Cole Hamels 9-6(21) 3.49(143)
Joe Blanton 5-12(21) 5.08(77)
Jamie Moyer 9-6(21) 3.76(119)
Kyle Kendrick 8-4 (20) 4.87(91)
Adam Eaton 3-8(19) 5.71(78)
Brett Myers 3-9(18) 5.82(77)

Floyd would now be the #2 starter on this team, a team that suddenly gets into a lot of 3-2 and 2-1 games. Freddy Garcia, whom Floyd was traded for prior to the 2007 season, is still rehabbing from shoulder surgery and is scheduled to begin throwing for teams on August 5.

Jimmy Rollins Doesn't Care About Your Rules

That's right. Jimmy Rollins apparantly had something better to do yesterday than get ready to play baseball. The beneficiary? that man on the left of the page here.

Budding superstar Bruntlett filled in nicely, going 3-4 for the day.

There has been no word about why Rollins was late to the ballpark, although that's never stopped me from speculating before. Listed below are the possible reasons, from most likely to least likely:

-Tag teaming trannies with Arod

- Thinking of another nickname to give self

- Pondering new ways of hitting 30 points lower than last season

- Smoking Weed

- Out all night partying...

- Trying to pretend that he is "big time" enough for the New York lifestyle

- Some legitimate reason

Also, while this team leader was on the bench, the Phillies offense did nothing, scoring only one run on a solo shot by Werth. Where is this offense?

Ed Wade Talks Tough, Gets Thrown Down by the Neck Like Little Girl

This man is Shawn Chacon (shuh-cone). He's a journey, having bounced around to several different organizations after having the best season of his career with the yankees in 2005. He has not pitched well this season, getting bumped from the Astros rotation to the bullpen.

Ed Wade is the current GM of the Astros; he was the GM of the Phils prior to Mr. Gillick. Also, although this may not be relevant, no one likes him.

Wade demanded a word with Chacon while Chacon was eating. Chacon did not like this, so he grabbed Wade by the neck and threw him on the ground.

"I sat down to eat and Ed Wade came to me and very sternly said, 'You need to come with me to the office,'" Chacon said. "I said, 'For what?' I said, 'I don't want to go to the office with you and Cooper.' And I said, 'You can tell me whatever you got to tell me right here.' He's like, 'Oh, you want me to tell you right here?' And I said, 'Yeah.' I'm not yelling. I'm calm."

"He started yelling and cussing," Chacon said of Wade, according to a story on the Chronicle's Web site. "I'm sitting there and I said to him very calmly, 'Ed, you need to stop yelling at me.' Then I stood up and said, 'You better stop yelling at me.' I stood up. He continued and was basically yelling. So at that point I lost my cool and I grabbed him by the neck and threw him to the ground. I jumped on top of him," he said. "Words were exchanged."

Apparently, Chacon was about to be cut, demoted, or in some other way no longer part of the Astros.

Good old Ed Wade. He can always talk tough with scrub guys who are about to be demoted. To me, this reeks of an uptight executive guy who felt like he finally got a chance to take out some angst against an athlete, and tried to play it tough. Don't forget, this is the same Ed Wade that bent over for every demand any Phillies player ever made, to the detriment of the team. I'm thinking of the Schilling and Rolen trades, and all those no-trade clauses Wade agreed to.

I know I'm supposed to be appalled by this incident, but I can't help but laugh a little. Turns out, when you try to talk sh*t, sometimes people want you to back it up. Ed Wade backs it up...from his back. How's that working out for you, Ed?

Kyle Kendrick - Man's Man, Man About Town

Who knew that Kyle Kendrick could be the stopper? The phils wunderkind pitched 8 shutout innings on the way to a 4-0 phils victory.

Kendrick did well against lefties, who had been hitting over .300 against him for the season. When asked about his different approach, he said

"Approach? You know how I'm differing my approach? I'm coming at them from behind."

Kendrick then proceeded to stick his tongue out and make odd air humping gestures. When asked if he's developing any new pitches to deal with lefties, he said

"Yeah, I'm developing things. I'm working on developing a second little Kyle, so I can bang two broads at once. Otherwise, I'm not going to be able to mow down all this prime West Coast tail before we leave tomorrow."

Quick Gavin Floyd Update

He's now 8-3 with a 3.19 ERA in 14 starts. That ERA is better than, you guessed it, every single Phillies Starter, Hamels included.

So much for regressing to the mean.

In other news, Freddy Garcia is still injured, though he looks to begin his comeback attempt from shoulder surgery soon.

This Just In: Charlie Manuel and Jerry Manuel Not Related

We were this close, people. After Mets interim manager Jerry Manuel had finished wiping off his knife from stabbing Willie Randolph in the back, we were going to have an NL East Rivalry with family connections.

Uncle Chuck, as Charlie Manuel is affectionately known, is all down home catfishing knowledge, even with his occasional lapse in, well, actually managing a baseball team. Could we, the fans hope for a second Manuel in the NL East?

I envisioned post-game press conferences filled with references to cornbread and barbecued meats. Not a single question would be substantively answered. Botched hit-and-run? Tobacco cutting reference. Bad substitution? Discussion of Sherman's March to the Sea. Starting pitcher lit up? Comment on stewing alligators.

We were this close.

Turns out, they're, uh, not related.

Brett Myers is Not Good at Baseball

Brett Myers is an emotional baseball player. Likewise, he inspires emotion from Phillies fans, sometimes non-positive emotions. So let's see if we can separate the fact from fiction. We are all rational human beings, are we not?

Statement: Brett Myers is not living up to expectations.

Verdict: FACT. Brett Myers really hasn't been a good starting pitcher since the 2006 season, when he went 12-7 in 31 starts with a 3.91 ERA. His career ERA is 4.42, with his career ERA+ being 99. Again "average" ERA+ is 100. So, for someone who was supposed to be the next Phillies Ace, being a tick below average means you're not meeting expectations.

Statement: Brett Myers is better suited to the bullpen than to starting.

Verdict: FACT(so far), although a half season's worth of data isn't always reliable, as we learned by watching the career of Mr. Randy Wolf. Last year, as a reliever, Mr. Myers had 21 saves and a 2.98 ERA as a reliever. This year, as a starter, he's 3-8 in 14 games with a 5.34 ERA. His ERA+? 82. He's God-awful. He leads the league in earned runs allowed and home runs allowed. He's terrible.

Statement: Brett Myers is a jerk.

Verdict: FACT. In June of 2006, Brett Myers assaulted his wife in Boston. He subsequently became the topic of this Onion article, and people pretty much forgot. His wife later requested that the charges be dropped, although she never disputed the facts of the case. That's enough for me.

He also later called a reporter "retarded" after blowing a save last year, and had to be restrained by Pat Burrell. Presumably, he would have attempted to punch the gentleman in the face and pull his hair.

Statement: Brett Myers is the worst starting pitcher on the team.

Verdict: FACT. ERAs and ERA+ below:

Cole Hamels........3.36(130)

Jamie Moyer.......4.56(96)

Kyle Kendrick.....4.87(89)

Adam Eaton.........4.62(94)

Brett Myers..........5.34(82)

Wow. Bad pitcher. Jerk. Why is he still on the team?

Chase Utley: Hero, Baseball Savant....Awkward Man-Crush?

Recent recipient of the NL player of the week award. Current front-runner for NL MVP. Hitting .325/21/53. Has hit homeruns in five consecutive games twice this season. Has upgraded his defensive skills at second base to the upper echelon of the major leagues.

I totally think we could be friends. Not "special" friends, you know, 'cuz that would be gay. Not that there's anything wrong with that.

Similarly, it's not gay to mention that Chase Utley is one damn fine looking man. Even my grandmother agrees. (She says he looks "sharp," or "he's a nice lookin fella," but you get the point).

Not that I've ever been close enough to him to tell, but I'd bet he has very soulful eyes. I bet he's very deep, cares about the environment, and would educate me on the mating habits of various endangered species. A little owl or something, not one of those gross animals.

I bet we even like the same movies.

Oh, and he's cemented his roles as the number 3 hitter on a team that relies heavily on its offense, when the cleanup hitter isn't playing well. (I'm being nice, Chase thinks anger is ugly). Also, there's only one starting pitcher with an ERA that doesn't approach 5, so he's got to come through. He performs under pressure.

So, just for the record, if Utley asks you to go see a movie, like 27 dresses or something, would you go? You know, just the two of you, in that dark theater? I think you would. Not that anything would happen...the first time anyway. You've got class.

Gavin Floyd Update

You know it happens: You're dating a nice girl who could lose about 15 pounds. You break it off to go after some fine Portugese tail on that "business trip" you're taking to South Padre Island. She gets mad, hits the gym, and suddenly looks like a Centerfold.

You tell yourself that there's no way she can keep this up, that she'll "regress to the mean," that she'll put that 15 pounds right back on in six months when the Holloween candy comes out. You sit back and wait. And wait. And wait.

Since our last posting re: Mssr. Floyd, after his near-no hitter, he's progressed slightly back to the mean. Gavin is now 5-3 with a 3.22 ERA, which would make him...wait for it...the best Phillies starting pitcher.

Eaton........4.99
Hamels......3.73
Kendrick.....5.00
Moyer........4.65
Myers..........5.52

Floyd's ERA+ is 134. For those of you unfamiliar with crazy stats, it measures how much better Floyd is from the rest of baseball. Average ERA+ is 100. It's also park-adjusted, meaning that it's supposed to take into account where these games were played, in order to reduce what I like to call "The Chan Ho Park Effect." Floyd is currently 11th in the AL in this stat.

For contrast, Freddy Garcia is not on these lists, since he's still recovering from shoulder surgery. Also, those numbers would be good for eighth in the NL.

But don't worry, Phillies starting pitchers are at the top of the leaderboards in other areas. For instance, Brett Myers is second in earned runs allowed with 45(!). He's also tied for third in losses. He's allowed 15 home runs and 88 hits. AWESOME! Opening day starter anyone?

In non-sarcastic news, Hamels is pretty much at the top in all good categories, such as WHIP, etc. Moyer doesn't walk anybody. So we've got that going for us, which is nice.

Phillies Series Recap-Phils beat Nationals 2 games to 1

I know what you're thinking. You're thinking, Dizz-am, I wish someone would set a Phils Recap to quotes from the crap-tastic Stallone movie "Cobra." Consider it done.
Supermarket Killer: Get back! I got a bomb here! I'll blow this whole place up!
Marion Cobretti: Go ahead. I don't shop here.

Cole Hamels is good. He hasn't given up a run in 19 innings. Of course, he got a no-decision in game 2 of this series, since we decided to stop scoring runs, despite 7 innings of shutout, four hit baseball from Messr. Hamels.

Marion Cobretti: All right, just relax, Amigo. You wanna talk - we'll talk. I'm a sucker for great conversation.
Supermarket Killer: [shouting] I don't wanna talk to you! Now you bring in the television cameras in here now! C'mon, bring 'em in!
Marion Cobretti: Can't do that.
Supermarket Killer: Why?
Marion Cobretti: I don't deal with psychos. I put them away.

Ryan Howard! yay! he's hit five homeruns in his last 8 games to raise his average to .195. And yes, I'm celebrating because a former MVP is batting .195. It sure beats the .171 he was batting ten days ago, doesn't it?

Marion Cobretti: [shakes his head] You're a disease - and I'm the cure.

This one should be about Hamels. but why not Jamie Moyer? Six innings of shutout ball, throwing mainly and 82 mph heater. I love it. It's so beautiful, yet so crappy; maybe the other way around. Just like this movie.

Ingrid: Do you ever get involved?
Cobretti: With a woman?

This is for all those players with "tremendous upsides" playing for the Nats. Lastings Milledge - batting .241. Wily Mo Pena - batting .220. Elijah Dukes- batting .067. How's that working so far? Even Ryan Zimmerman, whom I feel is legit, is only batting .256. Ugh.

At this point, Wily Mo Pena is baseball's Kwame Brown-he looks like a player, he walks like a player, he talks like a player, but he doesn't ball like a player.

Night Slasher: You want to go to hell? Huh, pig? You want to go to hell with me? It doesn't matter, does it? We are the hunters. We kill the weak so the strong survive. You can't stop the New World. Your filthy society will never get rid of people like us. It's breeding them! WE ARE THE FUTURE!
Marion Cobretti: No! [aims his gun]
Marion Cobretti: You're history.

This one's for Uncle Chuck. Remember how this team sticks together and rides out bad streaks now. Sometime in July, we'll be calling for his head after a botched double switch or infield alignment. But for now, he's got a team with little starting pitching, two MVPs that haven't performed because of injury or (whatever we're calling whats wrong with Howard), and this team is 1.5 games out. Credit where credit is due.

Let's Play GM: Cole Hamels

Cole Hamels is 5-3 with a 2.89 ERA this year. For his career, he's 29-16 with a 3.54 ERA in 60 starts. He's 24 years old, and can't become a free agent until 2012. Last night, he threw his first career shutout, going 9 innings and only giving up 4 hits.

Consensus is, this guy's pretty good. So the smart thing to do would be to sign him now to a deal around 6 years, which will buy out his first two years of free agency, right?

Well, kinda.

Think about it like this. You're dating a certain young lady. She's an overall solid performer. Looks nice, doesn't embarass you in public, occasionally shuts up, and you're wondering if you should lock her down for the long term. The problem is, she occassionaly gets "injured" and can't perform at the high level you've come to expect. You're concerned that once you lock her down to a long term deal, it'll take away all her motivation to continue to strive to that All-Star level. It's a tough one. Let's break it down.

The Bad. Pat Burell. he's played well the past two years, but he was granted a similar package after he had a stellar second-year campaign in which he was decribed as possibly becoming "the right handed Barry Bonds." So while he's played well, he hasn't quite lived up to that moniker. I'm think Heather Locklear here. Fine lady, sure she is. Then why is she always a free agent? Why David Spade? Why, why, why?

The Good: Jimmy Rollins and Chase Utley. How great does Utley's 7 year 85 million dollar contract look now? Utley was in a similar situation after 2 year's service, and the phils bought out the rest of his arbitration years and the first few free agent years. Rollins is signed through 2011 with what amounts to a six-year, 46.6 million dollar deal (That includes a club option, but I'm pretty sure the Phils will pay him 8.5 million to play in 2011). Think of Candace Cameron and Jennie Finch.

Candace Cameron played DJ Tanner on full house, married Valeri Bure (oops, wrong Bure!) and is now pretty much a full time homemaker.

Jennie Finch was/is a softball pitcher for the Arizona Wildcats and Team USA. She amassed over 1,000 strikouts in her college career and won three gold medals. She also married pitcher Casey Daigle of the Minnesota Twins, or somewhere. He hasn't pitched in the majors since 2006.

The Rest: Hamels has a history of injury problems, including a degenerative condition in his back, elbow problems last year, and breaking his throwing hand in a bar fight. He's also a pitcher, and while starting pitchers are valuable, they are also notoriously injury-prone. I'm thinking Jessica Alba here. Good measurements, suspect intangibles. A Wait-and-see approach is advised.

So what do we think, Phils Phans? lock him up?

Stock Market Watch: Local Teams

It's the dawning of a new weekly feature her at YCLTA (wow, that doesn't work), the Stock Market Watch, where we track local teams, players, and stories. Enjoy.

Andy Reid: up 10 points. He's on the rise because of his recent candid interview with Angelo Cataldi on 610 WIP. However, he's got a definite ceiling because a) he refuses to run the football b) he and his coaching staff can't make halftime adjustments and c) he seems hell bent on alienating the best quarterback this phranchise has ever had. Keep away, he's due for a fall.

Chase Utley: up 4,000 points. on the rise because of carrying the Phillies for the month of April. On the downside, he seems kinda like a hippy. He also seems like he could show up at a sorority house and hit for the cycle. He's the complete package. Buy, but watch with caution.

Pat Burrell: Even. He's coming back down to earth from his .340 batting average. He'll strike out, but he's got a great eye at the plate, which will ensure that his OBP stays high throughout the year, giving the batters behind him opportunities to drive in runs. What's that? Pedro Feliz bats behind him? Oh. Nevermind.

Kevin Everett: Steady. You might remember him as the Bill's TE who broke his neck last season and was paralyzed. He was released by the Bills today, which gives him the opportunity to seek disability payments from the NFL of over 200k per year for as long as he's disabled. Considering he broke his neck, it's going to be awhile.

On a side note, Everett was recently awarded the Halas trophy, given to the NFL player who overcomes adversity. Now, don't get me wrong, but what adversity has this guy overcome, exactly? He broke his neck making 400k a year. He went from being a phenomenal athlete to a guy that can walk and talk, but has trouble using silverware. Seems like adversity kicked his ass. If it was the Halas trophy for getting your ass kicked with dignity, then yeah, it's his.

Sixers: Up 1.5 points. They got booted from the first round of the playoffs, but they won two games, and we were forced to recognize their existence post A.I. Buy and hold, but don't put the kid's college fund in there.

Flyers: Down 3 points. They've had a good run, but losing two defensemen in a series where those defensemen probably weren't going to be good enough...well, it doesn't look good. All other rational analysis aside, the Pens are just better.

Ryan Howard: Up .00000000001 points. He's got a hit in his last four games, upping his average to .171. That's the good news. The bad? His average is .171.

Pass the Haterade on...Hippies

I decided a couple weeks ago that I'm going to stop writing when I'm upset, or angry. Unfortunately, given the nature of this site and the sports teams I follow, that's not going to be possible. Instead, I'll issue the following warning:

(The Following Message Was Written While the Author Was Under the Influence of Seething Rage)

and we'll all understand each other. That being said, let's move on.

For those of you who don't know, a shooting occurred outside of the club "Playmakers" here in Philly, which Marvin Harrison owns, on April 29. From bullet casings recovered from the scene, police have found that a gun Harrison owns was involved in the shooting. A man was shot through the hand right after getting into a fight with Harrison. The man who was shot has refused to identify the shooter. The gun was later found inside a garage/detail shop that Harrison owns. To date, Harrison has not been charged with anything.

This doesn't stop some people from jumping to their own conclusions. (A particularly good rebuttal of these has been done at Kissing Suzy Kolber). It doesn't take long to see where these articles are going. I expected this from some media members, but not SalPal, surely he wouldn't...

"The guns bullets were advertised as being able to penetrate...listen to this...48 layers of kevlar [armor] at 50 meters. Now who wears kevlar other than police officers? This gun is designed to be a cop killer."-SalPal, on Mike and Mike in the Morning, found here.

OF COURSE the gun's makers advertised that it was a powerful handgun! Do you expect a gunmaker to say, "Yeah, we've got this little cute pistol here, can't do much more than dent a wet paper bag at 50 feet, but ain't she purty?" An advertisement for a weapon (actually the weapon's armor piercing ammunition) doesn't automatically give some license to discern the intent of the manufacturer. Unless, maybe 1) you don't know dick about guns, 2) you're trying to sensationalize a story, and 3) you're looking to impugn a man's character. For instance, other guns that can pierce kevlar include: just about every hunting rifle ever made.

To put SalPal's response in perspective let's put his comments in a different context, using the following formula:
Advertisement+Word association game (kevlar::cops)+Negative assumption based on the Word Association, using inflammatory language

"The Corvette's been advertised to go 0-60 in...listen to this...4.28 seconds, on the pavement. Now who else is on the pavement but mothers pushing their babies in a stroller? This car is designed to be a baby killer." Reductio ad absurdem? Absolutely, but the point stands.

Marvin Harrison owns a handgun. This handgun, when properly equipped, is capable of piercing kevlar vests at a certain range. Policemen wear kevlar vests. Marvin Harrison is an athlete. However, these factors do NOT make Marvin Harrison a cop killer.

I understand that the people inhabiting newsrooms all over the country are not demographically inclined to like guns. Newsies make love, not war. Peace, love, dope. I get it. Fine. Reasonable people can disagree about the handgun's place in modern urban society.

What we're seeing here is people transferring their own ideas about guns, athletes, and minorities onto this situation. The simple fact that we just don't know what happened outside Playmakers that night maybe isn't enough for these folks. "Guns! Black Men! Black Men with Guns! Must be Cop Killers!"

I mean, isn't there at least one columnist who's willing to withold judgment, both implicit and explicit? Who's willing to forsake a cheap headline? Thank you, Bob Kravitz. You're a saint.

What we're seeing in this situation is reminiscent of the Sean Taylor situation last year, when the national media basically blamed Taylor for getting shot in his own house during a botched robbery.

To be clear, Marvin Harrison is his own man. He might have done something wrong in this situation. He might have done something illegal in this situation. At this point, we don't know. To infer his guilt from gun ownership is wrong, and to print such things in full view of his family and loved ones is criminal.

Phils Recap: Don't Stop Believing

To the left is a picture on the "Man or Machine?" T-shirts that have been going around.

"Money won is better than money earned." Fast Eddie Felson, The Color of Money.

To that I'd like to add, games stolen are a whole lot more exciting than games conventionally won. Too lengthy? I'll work on it.

Any way you slice it, The Phightins absolutely s-s-stole that game last night. Watching early, I had zero confidence in Kendrick. His one saving grace, if he has one, is that his two-seamer generates a lot of double-play balls. He must be wanting to walk all those guys, then, to set up the double play (tongue in cheek).

The Good: Kendrick's mental toughness. I like Kendrick, I like his attitude, and I like the fact that I heard someone on talk radio blame his recent struggles on that famous prank the team played on him in spring training. Ridiculous.

The Bad: Ryan Howard. Hey, big guy! It's May. Until further notice, Messr. Howard will be referred to as "The Snowman" in this space--because he's Abominable. Sounds bad, doesn't it? Bad is what he is right now, hitting .163. When Pedro Feliz is hitting 60 points higher than you, it's time to get a move on. Also, Howard is so bad--so Abominable-- in the field that he got an error charged to him for muffing a throw from Utley on a double play. For those of you that don't follow baseball, well, that almost never happens, Haley's Comet style.

The Hero: Who Else? Chase "It's My Turn Now" Utley for banging in the winning run last night. If a Triple Crown is what it's going to take for this team to win, then Utley will do just that. First runner up to Victorino for getting clotheslined going to first, then stealing second and scoring the tying run. Honorable mention to Brunty, who's been swinging the ol' stick quite nicely lately, for doubling in the tying run and scoring the winning run.

The Goat: D-backs catcher Chris Snyder, for allowing the past ball on a strikeout pitch to Victorino. Victorino hustled to first, stole second, and you know the rest.

Notes: Pat the Bat has re-entered the atmosphere and is returning to earth. After batting in the .340s for most of April, he's at .305. For those of you lacking rudimentary math skills, that's still almost DOUBLE Howard's BA.

The Gavin Floyd Fan Club

This always happens to every one's favorite Phillies blogger, yours truly. Some relatively meaningless event transpires in the world of baseball and because that same event can in someway be linked to potential mismanagement by the Phils' front office, my inbox overflows, people stop by my office, (aka my cubicle) and I'm generally bombarded with 'I told you so' statements regarding the Phillies ineptitude. Yesterday, it was Gavin Floyd. Never in my life did I believe that I would dial up my voice mail, on my office phone no less, to find an urgent voice message left for me asking how could we have let Gavin the Wonderkid go. For those of you not up to speed yet, let's quickly lay things out.

On Tuesday night, now Chicago White Sox pitcher Gavin Christopher Floyd took a no-hitter into the ninth inning against the Minnesota Twins. This came on the heels of Floyd carrying a no-no into the 8th inning versus the Detroit Tigers only weeks before. Floyd managed to record one out in the ninth on Tuesday before surrendering a double to Joe Mauer. And by the way, kudos to Nick Swisher in CF for making a diving attempt on the ball even though he was a good eight feet away from it. This outing upped Floyd's record on the season to 3-1 and lowered his ERA to 2.50, more then respectable numbers.

Now, as you'll all remember, Floyd, now 25, was once a Phillie. He was traded prior to last season along with P Gio Gonzalez to the White Sox in exchange for Freddy Garica. We all know how that acquisition turned out. The Phils paid $10 million for 1 win out of a pitcher who turns out was damaged goods upon arrival.

With this groundwork now laid, let me get to my rant. The Phillies made one mistake in that trade and that was to not ask for the medical records or medically evaluate Garcia on their own. They took the word of Chicago GM Kenny Williams at face value and they paid a steep price for it, $10 million to be exact. That was the mistake, the boo-boo, the screw-up, the brain-cramp, the severe disregard for doing your homework. The error was not in trading Gavin Floyd. It doesn't matter if Floyd throws 15 shutouts in his next 15 starts, if he makes the Hall of Fame or if he nails more women on the Maxim Hot 100 list then Derek Jeter (who apparently is at 6). Here's what people don't get.

The Phillies weren't giving up on Gavin Floyd making it; they were giving up on him making it here. Anyone who ever watched him pitch an inning for the Phils knew that he did not have the makeup to pitch in a city like ours. Say what you will about this argument not holding much water, but the examples are plentiful. Carl Pavano. Jose Contreras. And who can forget our own lovable Andy Ashby? Many players simply don't have the mental make-up to succeed in a town where every pitch is scrutinized and where you're only as good as your last start.

Floyd had his shot here. He was given every opportunity for two seasons in a row to win a job in the rotation entering spring training. In 2005, he couldn't. In 2006, he didn't but he was given the nod anyway, if for no other reason then to see what he had. The results? 5-5 in 15 starts with an ERA over 8 in those 2 years. So the Phillies dealt him. And no one blamed them at the time. Remember, even though he was hurt, Williams wasn't going to give Garcia away for nothing. Doing that would've blown his cover that Garcia was banged up.

Furthermore, it was well documented that when Chase Utley got injured last year, Williams, knowing that he had fleeced the Phils in the trade, offered somewhat of a good faith gesture by dealing us Tad Iguchi for nothing. Iguchi was going to leave Chicago after the season and the Sox had no plans in resigning him nor were they in the race for the playoffs anymore. But still, they shipped Iguchi our way with a wink and a chuckle. Literally. There is a clip of Williams coyly snickering when asked if sending Iguchi to the Phils was an apology. So if it makes you feel better, think about it this way. The Phillies traded Gavin Floyd and Gio Gonzalez for Freddy Garcia and Tad Iguchi and the Phils don't make the post-season last year without Iguchi.

Finally, this isn't the most lopsided trade in the history of baseball. This isn't Jeff Bagwell for Larry Anderson, not Scott Kazmir for Victor Zambrano, not A.J. Pierzinski for Francisco Liriano, Boof Bonser and Joe Nathan, not Babe Ruth for cash. Floyd is now 11-11 in his career with an ERA of 5.61. He couldn't strike me out. His strikeout to walk ratio is barely over 1-1. Without delving into a plethora of stats that paint the picture of Gavin's mediocrity, the point is just that. He's average. At best. And I'm not one to shed a tear over the loss of something easily replaceable.

One More Reason to Be Mad about the Freddy Garcia deal

Gavin Floyd of the Chicago White Sox flirted with a no-hitter last night, giving up a double to Joe Mauer in the 9th inning. What does this mean to you, faithful Phillies fan? THANKS FOR ASKING, I'LL TELL YOU.

This year, Mr. Floyd has an ERA of 2.50 after six starts, and a record of 3-1. Some of you might recall that Mr. Floyd was once a member of your beloved Phightins.

Gavin Floyd was the fourth overall pick in the 2001 draft by the Phillies. He recieved anunheard of --for the Phillies, anyway-- 4.2 million signing bonus. He progressed fairly well through the minor leagues, looking to be the next big Phillies Ace. (what's that? You can't think of the last big Phillies Ace?)Then he got called up.

After pitching well in spot-starting duty in 2004, Mr. Floyd proceeded to amass an ERA of 8.18 in 80 total innings in 2005-2006 (15 starts, a total of 18 appearances). This led to the inevitable conversations of general no-heartiness that occur when a player does not immediately succeed in Philadelphia. Gavin is a nibbler. Gavin doesn't challenge hitters. Gavin can't hit his spots. Gavin wears man-hose, Gavin operates an ice-cream truck in the offseason, Gavin relies too much on his curveball. I must have heard them all a thousand times.

Next comes the icing on the cake. Cranky old man Pat Gillick traded Floyd and Gio Gonzalez for Freddy Garcia before the 2007 season. Great trade for the Phils, aquiring a proven starter for two prospects.

You know the rest. Despite reports that Garcia had lost about 10mph in the last 6 months, the Phillies did not have him examined by team doctors before making the trade. Garcia cost the Phils 10 million, got one win, and had to have shoulder surgery midway through the season. (he still pitched better than Eaton). Garcia is currently a free agent, claiming to want to sign with a team that needs help about midway through the season.

Floyd, having been drafted out of high school, is still only 25 years old. He had a 5.27 ERA with the White Sox last year, and it appears as though the light has finally come on. (I'm coveniently leaving out the fact that his most comparable player according to baseball-reference.com is Blake Stein, who doesn't play baseball anymore. At least not for money. Well, that the IRS knows about. Where was I?)

In short, we gave up Floyd, a budding star, or at least possible solid starter, who's making approximately 600k this year, for Freddy Garcia, who we paid 10 million to win one game. Also, I have to believe that signing Adam Eaton factored into this equation somehow.

One one side of the scale, gavin floyd, possible stud, probable starter. On the other, an old cranky man, a torn rotator cuff, and a crapload of sour grapes. Yes, boys and girls, you CAN lose them all.

Cheers and Jeers

Cheers to my arch enemy Ryan Howard for finally coming through in the clutch. He of the .184 average and 39 SO finally played at little more like Big Papi circa 2004 and a little less like A-Rod circa forever. I'm still not in love with a HR for every 6 or 7 punchouts but maybe this is what the big fella needs to get going. Cheers are also in order for Mr. Flash Gordon ( I haven't called him Flash for a while now). After that 4 hit, 5 run debacle in the opener, Flash has settled in and is gaul darn near unhittable. In April, he has gone 10 innings, giving up only 5 hits, 2 ER, 5 BB and has fanned 12. Let's hope he stays this way for a while folks.

Jeers to the Sixers. A young team that showed heart all season including the first 3 games of the Pistons series turned into a bunch of sissys in games 4-6, losing each by at least 19 points. How did Iggy, our supposed (future) superstar scored only 16 points and continued his woeful FT shooting, going 7-12. Way to be clutch Iggy. Even Andre Miller, the heart and soul of this year's team only managed 11 points and 2 dimes. Great run boys, I just wish you came out liked you gave a d*mn in the last few. It should be a big year next year for Jason Smith, Thaddeus and Sweet Lou. Joe Banner, you don't even play sports in our fair city and you get the biggest jeers of all. B Dawk stuck up for his teammate and friend Lito. Dawkins isn't a disruptive force, he is a class act and arguably the most popular Eagle. You have a history of locking up players young to long contracts that they eventually become unhappy with. Yes, Lito signed it and should honor it but you could have spoken with him prior to the Samuel signing. In my opinion, Samuel is a system player and may be better than Lito, but only marginally. Lito has injury issues but can still match with Samuel any day of the week given the right system and players around him. For you to say that B Dawk doesn;t know what is going on is crazy. He has been around this organization for about a decade so I think he knows EXACTLY what's going on. I just hope you know what'g going on after Weapon X "accidentally" give you a Wolverine tackle during pre-game.

Game 4 Running Diary

(Author's note: These diaries are long blogs. You may find them entertaining, scratch that you WILL find them entertaining. Do yourself a favor and print it out for the next bathroom trip. Good reading.)


So here we are on the day of arguably the most important Flyers game in my 26 years and 11 months (to the day, only 12 shopping days left folks!!!!) Our beloved Orange and Black have the chance to go up 3-1 on the hated Montreal Canadiens. I used to hate the Rangers and Devils and dislike all other teams. In the last two years, the list has grown to include The Penguins, Capitals and now Montreal. With all of the talk about a conspiracy theory against the Flyers, Philly fans have taken to scrutinizing every shaky call (there are more than a few) and non-call. I talked to a buddy of mine at work today, “Gordie” aka Mr. Hockey who knows quite a bit about hockey. When I asked him if the Flyers would win the series if they win today and go up 3 games to 1, his response was, “I think they win the series either way”. You have to understand, this man is what you would call a hockey geek (and I mean that in a 100% complimentary way). He and my buddy Shrek talked about the 3rd string goalie for the Capitals at a game that we all attended and I thought my head would spin off of my body. He is not prone to “homerism” as much as I am, if at all and these are his thoughts. Good things.
After the rousing response to my game 3 running diary ( two emails, one in-person compliment and 4 flaming bags of dog crap at the front door of The Power estate), we are back for Game 4. The Rook has already agreed to attend tonight’s game so let’s review: Flyers record when the Rook and I drink and watch the game:4-0 Flyers record when I do a running diary:1-0. As The Great LoveTron4000 would say, this is “double plus good”. Combine this with the fact that Montreal has a legitimate goalie controversy now, and there backup is Jaroslav Halak, who has in appeared in all of 6 regular season games, logged 18 minutes of postseason action and faced only 2 SOG ( he was playing the Flyers after all), and this is a recipe for success for the orange and black. If they start this kid, they are in trouble, he doesn’t look old enough to buy cigarettes. At least Carey Price has a healthy GAA of 3.86 against the Flyers…..oh wait, I guess the Price is WRONG *****!!!!!! On the other hand, we have Marty who’s got a 92.3% SV, has faced 35 SOG a game and turned away all but 8 (and none of them were bad goals). Price’s save percentages over the last two games have been 75 % ( 3 goals on just 12 SOG) and 82.3%. Granted, the Flyers need to get more SOG and I think they need a two goal game out of Briere so they go back to Montreal with him having some confidence for when those morons start to boo him. The pick for tonight: Flyers 4 Montreal 2





6:17 PM: The Rook walks through the door. Ready to rock.


6:18 PM-7:00 PM: We discuss the game and I am happy to hear that I have earned a top 3 seed in a beer pong tournament for this weekend.


7:01 PM: I receive the following news of a good nature: The game is on Comcast, not Versus, Knuble is playing and Halak is starting for the Habs. The Rook cracks a joke about the Flyers playing against two teams. When I finish the joke, he acts surprised. Crazy young people.


7:04 PM: I receive the following bad news: we only have 8 beers. Looks like a 1st intermission beer run is in order.


7:11 PM: Refs announced. No Koharski, no French A Holes. Nice.


7:12 Pm:Early save by Marty. Knuble nails someone to announce he's back.


7:14 PM: first beer is cracked. MMMMMM cold beer. I also receive a call from Lovetron. He's a good egg.


7:19 PM: As I struglle to fix a basement light, Richards gets called for Borading (B.S.) Carter still gets a nice breakaway and just barely misses.


7:20 PM":Marty bangs out a few nice saves in a row. Flyers kill PP as the Rook calls Biron " The Wizard". He is magic in net.


7:24 PM: Coatesy and Clement discuss the conspiracy theory against the Flyers, they nicely say it's true. I love those guys, well Clement anyway. LoveTron texts me that he is feeling a big gamefrom Carter.


7:27 PM: we go to commercial and the Rook gives me a bunch of lip about not putting the Phillies game on. Strike 1 young man......


7:29 PM: Still trying to fix this light....Lupul gets a shot on goal and Jim Jackson creams himself. Lovetron informs me Briere sucks.....a little scrum after the whistle...Dirty playing Hab SOBs. ROUGHING ON KUKKONEN?!?!?! ! WTF?!?!?!?!?! The rook lets a stream of profanity fly that would make a sailor proud.


7:32 PM: Great penalty kill so far....couple of non calls that could have helped the Flyers. Conspiracy. C-O-N-spiracy. Great glove save by Biron.


7:37 PM: Finally got the light working. 3 minutes left in a wild first period. Still not enough SOG for the Flyers. The Kapinen shot was the first since the Carter breakaway.


7:41 PM: They show a guy in a black LeClair jersey and fake Flyers helmet who looks remarkably like Dwight Schrute from the Office. You have to love a guy who doesn;t care how he looks and wants to support his team. ( note: I type this as I throw on my Peter "Turncoat Bastard" Forsberg Flyers jersey to make my beer run.)


7:44 PM: Save by Marty with 6 seconds left.



7:57 PM: The Rook and I return home from the beer run. I wanted Hop Devil but alas, my townie beer store does not carry it. We settle on the old standby, Coors Light, the official beer sponsor of Maxxx Power. Because we are responsible ( well sorta) we have each only had one beer up until this point. That number will increase dramatically and quickly over the next few hours.

7:59 PM: The Phils are on, down 3-2 to the Padres. I check the Phillies site and see that Utley has hit a 2 run home run. I inform the Rook of this fact and we agree that Utley is hot. By "hot" we mean he is hitting very well, not attractive. As I type this Utley hits a 576 foot foul ball with a beautiful compact swing. Flyers are back now.

8:05 PM: We franticly flip backand forth between the Phillies on CN8's horrible standard definition feed to catch Chase's AB and Comcast's gorgeous HD feed. CN8 is horrible by standard definition standards let alone HD. I have a plasma HD TV and no PIP. WTF. Too many abbreviations AHHHHH!!! Utley called out on a horrible call on a checked swing. I'm Maxxx Power, meet my alter ego, Homer Philsson.

8:08 PM: Carter gets a SOG and Jackson creams himself again, causing me to nearly spill my beer on my laptop. I like Jim Jackson, his goal calls are great but he gets WAAAAYYYY to excited when someone gets a SOG.

8:10 PM: Marty's good. Comcast decides to flash a graphic with the Flyers' lead time through the series thus far, it's good. This does not bode well for our boys in orange and black.

8:11 PM: A flurry of activity on Biron including the Kotitsyns ( SP?) each getting a shot off.

8:13 PM: We're both angry and increasing our drinking, this bodes VERY well for our boys.

8:15 PM: It's time for the PEEEEECCCOOOOOO Power Play!!!!!! Off of Knuble's skate, blown chance, he gets a pass for being awesome ( this postseason he has earned the right to wear #22, that of my favorite....uuuuuhhhhh) RJ SHOOT HE SCOOOOOOOORRRREEEESSSSS!!!!! I jump up and slap hands with the Rook and shout " that's my boy!!!". It's at this moment I realize that my neighbor is outside right by my door. Crap. Oh well. I call my boy Shrek and BS a bit. Marty stops another flurry of shots including a great glove save where he looks it all the way in to his glove AGAIN. Umberger loses his stick and Marty makes a save.Puck cleared. One timer is batted down by Marty. Power play over now. 27-11 SOG Montreal. Here we go again.

8:23 PM: Phils are back and we wonder what Howard has done. 0 for 1 with a walk and a lineout. No Strikeout?!?!?!?! Still batting a sizzling .175 though. JAckson creams himself after a SOG. Someone get the man some new boxers.

8:29 PM: There's a scrum after a SOG by the Flyers. Jim Dowd skates up to it to intervene by telling the combatants a story about the War of 1812.

8:30 Pm: Phils are back on, why are they wearing green hats?!?!?! Is it Earth Day?

8:32 PM: A brief thoughts runs through my head: Biron has been especially good with the glove these playoffs...what if after every great glove save and play stoppage the PA system at the Wachovia Center played " Whole Lotta Love" by Led Zeppelin and instead of love the crowd shouted GLOVE? It would be great, although sacreligious with respect to Zeppelin and the fact that it would jinx Marty...what if I applied my thoughts to good use? I need more beer.

8:36 PM: " You need cool saves, baby Marty's got cool saves...he's gonna send you down, back to AHL baby. "( John Bonham is rolling over in his grave right now.)

8:39 PM: Period over, 1-0 good guys.

8:44 PM: Werth with the stolen base. What a job by Jason and (gulp) even Bruntlett lately replacing J Rol and Shane. Brunty strikes out. What a wang gobbler.

8:46 PM: Morganti compliments Umberger and Bundy compliments Briere. The Rook and I argue about who is better. We settle on the following: Danny in round 1, RJ in Round 2 and we'd want Briere overall ( pain in my heart.) Apparently the green hats for the Phils have something to do with the environment. There is some hippie tree hugger talking about renewable energy with T Mac. Go get a haircut hippie. St. Patrick's Day is the only time that the Phillies should wear green. How many trees died making the stickers for the hats and the boxes they were shipped in? Wheels is babbling on about politics. I haope Harry busts an empty bottle of Jack on the table tonight and shanks him in the 8th inning.

8:51 PM: The wife has fallen asleep early. The Rook yells loudly and apologizes. His pennace is getting me a beer.

8:52 PM: The Rook has not taken a seat since 7:00 PM with the exception of maybe 2:00 worth of car time to and from the beer store. His reasoning is that the Flyers and Phillies play better when he stands and gets into the games. Good for him. Good for Philly fans.

8:53 PM: T.O. sucks. I am pretty sure that he deserves to get sued more than anybody in the history of the world has ever deserved it. At work today, I recounted the story of a Dallas fan getting stomped out in front of me at a Monday Night game in Philly circa 1997. The Birds had just lost and the guy was running his mouth in a #22 jersey. It was ripped off of him and tossed over the railing at the Vet. I am not saying it's right for 6 guys to beat up one guy, but I understand. Go Birds.

8:57 PM: No "orange out" today. Quite disappointing. It's called an " Orange Crush" per my buddy Gordie, but this is Maxxx's blog.

8:59 PM: Kukkonen gets checked into the boards by some fairy. It's the weakest looking check I have ever seen. I am built like Todd PInkston and I can check harder than that. He's probably French. They like cigarettes or "fags" as they call them. Seems about right.

9:00 PM: RJ gets calls for slashing. HORSE****!!!!!!!!!!! C-O-N- spiracy. ( A tap on the hands as stated by Bill Clement. We love Bill.) Lovetron texts about the ineptitude of the officials. He's been sent back in time to change the hockey future for one lucky team. Power play killed. I'd like an insurance goal.

9:04 PM: I shat you not.....I typed the previous sentene and looked up just before Hartnell scored. Lovetron texts me lewd things about Hartnell.

9:06 PM: I call Shrek's wife Fiona since Shrek sometimes doesn't answer during games. We talk about the goal and she informs me that Shrek ( the biggest Flyers fan I know along with Gordie, has left for his own hockey game because he is expecting a Flyers loss. His marriage is a front if you catch my drift.)

9:08 PM: Some queer on Montreal gets hurt. You hate to see that, only the official don't whistle the play and the Habs take offense to the fact that the Flyers keep playing, even though that is what they were supposed to do. C-O-N-spiracy.

9:17 PM: Somebody get Jim Jackson some help. He gets all fired up for a simple routine shot on goal. 7:26 left and Jim mentions that there are a lot of topics left to discuss on the postgame show. Someone is getting ahead of themself methinks.

9:19 PM: GOAL MONTREAL. It goes off of Hatcher. Five hole. Not Marty's fau;t. 3 Montreal fans are shown in the crowd. They are all about 60 years old. I hope they get dealt with after the game. GOAL MONTREAL. 37 seconds apart. Koivu catches the rebound, waits and gets a decent goal on Biron. Hard to read.

9:24 pm: Delayed call against Montreal. The Rook thinks the whistle was late. I yell at him. He yells back and gets me a beer. All is forgiven. PEEEECCCCCCCOOOOOO POWER PLAY!!!!!!

9:27 PM: Danny Briere scores. The Rook and I slap hands and do a fruity dance. I am not ashamed of this. Danny is the man.

9:29 PM: Extra man is on and Biron gets the save. Play is stopped allowing me to type. WOOOOOOO!!!!!

9:31 PM: More stats. NOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!

9:32 PM: Stevens gets the timeout. I hate Canadian people, unless they have ever played for the Flyers. In that case, you get a Molson XXX, eh.

9:34 PM: My boyfriend RJ Umberger puts away the game with an empty netter. Carter with the assist. Slap hands.